JEHOVAH RAPHA "I am the Lord Your Physician or I am the Lord Your Healer - this name especially was a Name God prophetically spoke about Himself, not one that someone gave Him. Exodus 15:26.

Continued from 2 posts down…

So, what do I know? Not much really. I’m not a theologian and feel as if I’m a total newbie to this whole subject. I’m continuing to pray without ceasing regarding other health issues in my life and will continue to do so until I’m totally healed or God says, “thats enough son, it’s not going to kill you and you don’t need to pray about it anymore”. I just figure, why not? If my sinuses are bothering me (and they are) and Jesus can heal them, why not ask for that? If my blood pressure is still high (and it is), and Jesus can heal that, why not ask Him to do it? So, I am. I ask for everything. I’m not being selfish, just asking as a child would his daddy. The difference is, my Dad can heal from just speaking the word!

Now, I know that some health issues can be controlled with good food and exercise, so I’m focusing on that to help with the blood pressure. If you know something and don’t appropriate it, it’s just being stupid. We all know that if you control your weight and eat fruits and vegetables your heart will benefit, so I’m gonna do all that too. Another thing that really bothers me is having to get up multiple times a night to pee. I sleep good when I’m sleeping but wake up often to relieve myself. It’s something I’ve dealt with for years due to the radiation treatment I took. I am asking the Lord to heal me of that. I would love a full night’s sleep again. One thing I’ve found (as if it’s been a big secret or mystery) is that healing can come through praise. Jesus promised my healing during a praise service and I find now that when I’m alone and in worship I can feel His healing touch. I love to praise and worship Him and I know that He loves to hear it. That kind of relationship cannot help but spawn healing.

But, more than all of these things, I want to be able to pray for others and for them to enjoy the same miraculous healing that I have enjoyed. I am taking a class offered by our church soon on praying for the sick and hurting and I just can’t wait for it to start. I want to learn how to minister to others so that they can find deliverance, peace, healing and salvation.

I know God will not hesitate to grant that prayer.

JEHOVAH RAPHA "I am the Lord Your Physician or I am the Lord Your Healer - this name especially was a Name God prophetically spoke about Himself, not one that someone gave Him. Exodus 15:26.

Okay, so you believe God can heal but has He?

I’m glad you asked that question. On Wednesday the 7th of December I went to church to have the elders pray over me in obedience to the book of James. As I stated before, I was depressed, had memory loss, had cancer, high blood pressure and could not have physical relations with my wife (due to the cancer treatment). Jesus promised my healing during the service and I left with my heart full of joy. The pastor had also taught that the Lord promised sweet sleep for His children, so I asked Him on the way home to help me sleep. I have not slept without the assist of pills for a number of years.

I was able to sleep that night without aid, although it did take a while to fall asleep. Since that time I have slept without help and am getting up fewer times during the night. I would sometimes get up as much as once an hour before, but last night only got up twice. I sleep soundly and peacefully, and am rested. This is a big deal for me, since I haven’t really slept well for over 10 years.

I have been on anti-depression medication for 5 years, and still had bouts that would just wear me out. Since that night I have neither taken the medicine nor needed it. It’s been 1 week now and there is just no reason to take it. Not only have I not been depressed but His joy is so overwhelming that I am in complete peace. I have so much patience now and feel like a new man. He truly gives the ‘peace that passes understanding’.

Warning: the following is rather personal but is a major part of my healing:

The cancer treatment completely took away my sex drive. I neither desired sex nor could I perform if I had wanted to. I had resolved myself to living without it even though I knew it was affecting my relationship with Kathy. We loved each other but could no longer enjoy the intimacy intended in the marriage relationship. Now, you need to understand that I could NOT have sex. It was physically impossible for me. And, I did not desire it anymore. It was not a part of my life.

On the Friday after the Lord touched me I came home from work and greeted Kathy as she was preparing the evening meal. I gave her a kiss as I always do but this time I felt an old and familiar stirring in my body. I kissed her again and told her what I was feeling and she laughed since I had not said anything like that for years. We sat down to eat dinner (the grandkids were watching a movie and would eat later) and the stirring in my body kept increasing until it consumed my thoughts and I just had to laugh. My body was responding in a way that had not occurred for a long time, but there was an unmistakable sign that my sex drive had returned. I told Kathy that we needed to be excused to the bedroom and we got up, locked the bedroom door, locked the bathroom door and then hid in our walk-in closet. It was there that we once again enjoyed the intimacy of marriage. It had been nearly 5 years and afterwards I cried like a baby and she laughed and laughed. My God can not only heal the human body, but can restore the effects of years of treatments! We knew this was an unmistakable sign from God that what He promised was coming to pass.

I will meet with my doctor tomorrow to discuss my medication and I’ll tell him at that time that I won’t be taking it again. I’ll continue to be tested so that God can receive the glory that is due Him, but I am not the least bit worried. He holds the number of my days and He knows my body, and I trust only in Him.

I’m sure there are many that will be skeptical and will try to explain away what God has done, but I pity them and their unbelief. I know what it’s like because I lived that way for many years. But when God restores and quickens your heart as He has mine, there is only peace, hope and love. Doubt must be fought with faith and the sureness of His word. Fortunately, the word will not return to Him without accomplishing what He has intended. He WILL receive all the glory and praise, whether we do it here on this earth or when He demands it on the day of judgment. I will rest in Him and His word. I will let it fill me, cleanse me and encourage me every day and as many times a day as I can. Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God. I want my faith increased to the miracle stage where I can minister to others who are sick and wounded, bound up in sin and in need of forgiveness. I want my life to be an example of what it’s like to follow Him unconditionally and to show what His love is really like.

I hope this is encouraging. I will continue to update as I have things to share.

JEHOVAH RAPHA "I am the Lord Your Physician or I am the Lord Your Healer - this name especially was a Name God prophetically spoke about Himself, not one that someone gave Him. Exodus 15:26.

I want to chronicle some of the events that have been taken place in my life (after all, this site is supposed to be all about me, right?). I do so as a testimony to what God has been doing in my life and what He has promised will happen.

I personally believe that God speaks clearly to His children, they know His voice, and another they will not follow (John 10:27). From a young child I was amazed that God would actually talk to us in a manner that we could understand. I am grateful He does so and convinced He has conversed recently with me. Jesus sent the Holy Spirit into the lives of His children. The Holy Spirit is our comforter and guide. He reveals God’s word to us so that we can follow Him and not be led astray. This same Holy Spirit has very clearly spoken to me and given me great comfort about the state of my life and how He wants to work in my life.

Toward the end of November our church took up a thanksgiving offering. I left the service because I had nothing set aside to give. Our money was very tight and we just didn’t have much we could give. I went home and told Kathy some time that day that we were disobedient in not giving a tenth to the Lord and we would begin that payday whether we could afford it or not. I did not do it because I had faith in God necessarily, but I was tired of struggling with the knowledge of what God wanted me to do and then not doing it. Kathy agreed and we both found it a relief to do what we knew was right. I believe this small step was the first of many that led to an amazing encounter with God. I have had cancer since 2001. I did the radiation thing and it was okay until around 2006 when it obviously came back. The doctor recommended a hormone treatment that should stop its growth and that seemed to work fine because my count went back down to zero. The problem with the treatment is its many side effects. I lost my sex drive, experienced bouts of deep depression, had uncontrollable hot flashes (this really was aggravating in the summer) and experienced memory loss that grew worse every year. The drug will also cause you to gain weight and lose muscle tone and this depressed me even more. The drug I took to control the depression gave me diarrhea so bad I had to keep extra clothes at work. Another problem is that the drug can harm your liver and my blood work recently indicated a potential problem there. On top of all that my blood pressure was high and I had 2 incidents where I had to be transported to the hospital with my BP over 210.

All of these problems began to build in my life and recently, over the course of a few weeks, I was to the point where I just could not stand it any longer. The depression and memory loss was so bad that I left band practice last week nearly in tears. I could not remember the songs or how to play them. We are taking care of 2 of our grandchildren and I also felt guilty in leaving them with Kathy so much. I was just a very sorry excuse of a man and Christian. I did not like myself at all and was just tired of the whole thing.

It was at that point that I began seeking God for healing. I didn’t really believe that God actually heals anymore, but I was desperate and had nowhere else to turn. My step dad loaned me some books on divine healing and I also began to seek the scriptures myself to find any hope from God. I had believed the many conservative teachers who taught against healing and had to find out for myself that God was actually concerned about me and concerned enough to actually help me. Are we alone when we have sickness? Is He deaf to our cries? Do we only have doctors to rely on who admittedly don’t know why we get cancer and don’t really have a cure? If that is all true I was without hope. I felt like I had to quit the treatment which meant I would be at its mercy and I would die shortly. Now I’m not trying to develop a treatise or doctrine on the scriptural basis of healing, but what I found for me from the scriptures is that God calls himself “I am the Lord, your healer”; Jesus healed everyone who came to him for healing; Jesus is the same yesterday, today and forever; and “by His stripes we were healed” to name just a few. So I just started seeking God concerning the truth of these words and I just bombarded Him with prayer for my healing. I purposefully cast aside any and all doubts regarding His desire to heal and claimed His word over my body (when you come to the end of yourself and have no one who can really help, you do what you knew to do but were afraid to ask). I did not name it or claim it in the sense we’ve heard prosperity preachers present God, but I did speak His word to my body and claimed the name of “I am the Lord your healer” as my healer. I asked God to not only heal me of the cancer but restore my body to what it was before the treatments.

I do have a record of healing in my life and was reminded of it during my meditations. When I was born again in 1972 God released me from the bonds of drug use, healed my mind from paranoid schizophrenia, and took nicotine addiction away from me instantly when I gave it to Him. I was healed of it all but thought nothing of the miracle aspects of it. I just thought it was normal for new Christians to get all those benefits. I was delivered from bondage and healed instantly of mental issues. Unfortunately I was influenced toward skepticism by well meaning doctrinally based teachers. I moved slowly from a belief in a miracle working God to a set of doctrines that handily dealt with all of life’s issues by explaining how things obviously changed after the New Testament. I still knew God wanted to win the lost, but I became afraid to offer them the promise of deliverance or a miraculous life. My sales pitch would honestly be something like, “come to Jesus; He will forgive you of your sins, take you to heaven when you die, and recruit you into witnessing for others”. I avoided instant deliverance, healing, perfect peace, freedom from lust, greed or anger, I would pray for others but not with any confidence that God cared to offer those things in this life. On Wednesday, November 7, 2011 I was driving to church. I had asked the elders to pray over me in obedience to James 5:14. I wanted to do things God’s way. I don’t know what prompted me, but as I was praying about my condition and the upcoming service I felt compelled to rebuke the devil and his hold on my life. I verbally rebuked him and told him he had no business in my life because Jesus was my Lord and had bought me with a price. I had not considered his involvement in my life because I didn’t think I had let him or his demons have any influence over me. After I had spent a few minutes addressing him and demanding his exit from my life the Spirit of God overwhelmed me. It was as if God now had the freedom to minister to me. I realized at that time that I had been guilty of unbelief. I had halted God’s work in my life and given place to the devil by listening to and agreeing with his lies. I begged God’s forgiveness and welcomed His presence again in my life. When I arrived at church and when the worship time began I was so free. I could worship Him like I couldn’t ever remember doing. We laughed and cried together and He put His arms around me and promised my healings. The reality of the Living God was as evident as the chair behind me. I knew at that time that I would be free for the rest of my life. I would walk with Him, worship Him and receive His word at all times.

Jesus is my healer. No one else is my healer. God is jealous over me and will receive all the glory from my life. Doctors can do a lot of wonderful things but only God can heal. Doctors can repair broken bones and sew up wounds but they have no authority over the immune system or my blood cells. Only God has authority over every cell in my body. Only God can see my inner most organs and know what they need to be well and function correctly. God has set aside the mysteries of life and health to be His own. We may probe His mysteries and scratch the surface of how the universe works and how the body works, but we will never, ever be able to probe the depths of His wisdom. He created the body and still has authority over it. We live and breathe because He desires for us to. We can no more delay our time of departure than we could have predicted our time of arrival. These are all under the authority of God and no one else. I have not experienced all of the results of my healings. I’m not dealing with depression anymore (because I have the peace that passes understanding). My memory seems to be better and my blood pressure reading was wonderful this morning (even after forgetting my medicine last night). I am relaxed and in peace, which I have not felt since some time shortly after my salvation. I have appointments with my doctors to discuss my medications but I’m honesty anticipating that I will have no need of them shortly (and I had already decided to quit the cancer medication). Time will tell when God heals my cancer because I’ll have to have regular blood tests to insure it doesn’t return. I continue to pray earnestly for the restoration of my body. The medicines have really wrecked havoc on it, but God can even fix all of that. I just know that God loves me, desires I live an abundant life and is the only hope for healing that I have. I love Him and spend every moment I can in worship and prayer. I have a great burden for others and spend much more time in prayer for them. I pray not only for their salvation and deliverance but for their healing too.

Only God can heal.

Further posts will come when there’s something worth saying…

Health Problems

I’m really writing this to sort of remember it all in the future. Since I was diagnosed with cancer over 10 years ago I have been gaining weight, seemingly unable to control my choice of foods. This has led (obviously) to other health problems such as high blood pressure, headaches, depression, sinus problems, snoring and probably sleep apnea. I have relied on medicine to go to sleep, wake up, breath, cure everyday headaches, and feel better. I knew I was headed for a shorter life and did not enjoy not having energy or self-control.
Kathy and I took 2 weeks off and spent some time in Montana and surrounding areas with some friends and I had time to think about my life. I wanted to do better but realized I just couldn’t do it without some help. That’s what I mentioned to my daughters when they chided me on my size, pray for me because I can’t do this on my own.
I’m assuming that what happened to me later was a direct result of that prayer.
We got back on the 26th of August and I settled back into work. On the 7th of September I was at work and got a bad headache during lunch with some friends. When I got back to the office I started feeling worse and finally walked down the hall to the clinic and had my blood pressure checked. It was 162/98 which is very high. The nurse asked if I wanted to lay down and I said “no”, I would go back to work. Later as I was getting ready to leave for the day I started feeling light headed and flushed so I walked back down the hall to have my BP checked again. This time it was 182/118. She had me lie down in a back room and kept checking. In 15 minutes it was 210/124 which is really, really high and could have put me in jeopardy of having a stroke. She called an ambulance and I was taken to the hospital. They gave me 3 nitroglycerin pills and by the time I got to the hospital it was down some.
15:35 – 182/118
15:40 – 196/112
15:32 – 192/124
15:35 – EMS contacted
15:45 – 200/120
15:48 – 210/124
16:20 - Transported
But, as I was lying on the table in the clinic earlier I really thought I was going to die. I cried out to the Lord and asked Him to help me. I wanted to play with my grandkids; continue to work with my band and learn to pay guitar better; lead worship; spend time with my wife and children. I wasn’t afraid to die but just didn’t want to make the trip on that day. I also did not want a stroke and find out how that can ruin your plans.
I spent a miserable night in the hospital, hungry and hooked up to a heart monitor, BP machine and oxygen monitor. I passed the EKG’s and stress test and they let me go. But, I had already resolved that God had given me a warning and I would not dismiss it.
Since that time I have meditated on His words of healing promises and have adjusted my diet. I have started exercising and am now taking a second BP pill. I am still on most of the medicines I was on but am working to wean myself as God gives me wisdom to. I am not heading into this as a fool, but prayerfully and slowly. It has taken my body a week to adjust to no sugar but I now have plenty of energy.
I did wake up this week (2 weeks later) with severe vertigo but I think I have determined the reason. I have been having problems sleeping because my nose stops up after an hour or two into the night. I am confident it is because of allergens or dust in the air. I bought an air purifier today at Walmart and I hope that can make a difference. We’re also going to vacuum the room thoroughly and air it out to insure a cleaner environment. I have been using a nose spray nearly every night and am trying to wean myself off it now. It’s hard but I’m sure my sinuses will clear up soon.
I have worked this weekend Friday, Saturday and Sunday nights from 7pm to 7am and have been surprisingly energetic. I haven’t felt tired or sleepy very much and have been able to walk the hallways a few times during the night without getting fatigued. I didn’t sleep much Saturday but did sleep better on Sunday with the aid of a Benadryl. I hope I’ll be able to quit taking sleep aids soon but have to insure I’m rested to do my job effectively.
I have eliminated nearly all sugar except for honey and realized tonight that I also need to cut back the carbs a great deal too. I don’t feel like that’s too much of an issue but it’s not as easy to eliminate from your diet as sugar is. I’ll do the best I can and will hope God will bless the effort and help me lose weight quickly.

Wow! where have I been?

Sorry, just haven't had it in me to blog much. Kathy and I just got home from 2 weeks in Montana, Wyoming and Canada. We went out with 2 friends whom we've known for over 30 years and we all had a great time. The thing that really struck me was the diversity of landscape. It's amazing what the earth can form from catastrophe. The current landscape was obviously formed by a cataclysmic event from volcanos and earthquakes in the area, but God was able to fill it all back in with breathtaking beauty.

We saw moose, bear, elk, eagle, wolf, deer, goats and sheep, as well as people from the world over. We met people from California, England, Switzerland, Germany, Florida, Philly, New York, Washington, Asia, Ohio and many many other places too numerous to count. We saw so many mountains we got cricks in our necks, but never tired of the view.

God is very creative and works it all out for our good (our enjoyment). I can't wait to return.

Listening to the Voice of God

Our preacher’s been talking about this the last few Sundays and he’s just done a great job inspiring us to listen to the quiet voice of God.

Here’s a link if you’re interested in hearing what he had to say.

It has been good for me to hear the messages and to be reminded that I need to actively listen to my God’s voice. I must confess that I don’t always cultivate an atmosphere where He is welcome to interrupt me. I’m just as busy as anyone, and in fact, like to be busy, so I have to consciously make time to just listen to what He has to say.

I can remember as a young boy listening to a visiting preacher talk about how he and God had talked recently and I was overwhelmed that someone could actually talk to God and that God would talk back, as if He was personally interested in what we had to say. That awe struck feeling at such a thing has stayed with me over the years. I talk to God now as if He is my friend and constant companion. I talk to Him in whispers, out loud and through music, but do I ever just sit and listen to Him? Not as often.

Kathy will complain from time to time that I don’t listen to her closely enough and it’s true. I often let my mind wander while she’s talking and it’s just plain rude that I ask her to repeat what she just said. I should listen attentively to her every word because she’s important to me, and I need to know what’s on her mind.

How much more important is my God? I need to shut up on a regular basis and let Him speak His mind to me. He loves me and cares for me so much and I need to know Him as well as I can. The bible even says we have the mind of Christ. I just hope my mind is not kept so busy I can’t hear His.

A challenge, but a promising one that I look to enthusiastically.

Valentine’s Day?

Every day is Valentine’s day at my house. I am fixated on my wife and make it my goal to show her how much I love her in new ways every day. I buy flowers, do the laundry, clean up the kitchen and house, do the driving, give her kisses all the time, text her throughout the day telling her how much I love her and how great she is.

To be honest, I haven’t always been this obsessed, but I like doing it now. It has a lot to do with the cancer medicine I’m on, but it’s really just enhanced the feelings I’ve always had.

In fact, we were talking last night and both admitted that at one time or the other we each had doubts about our marriage. I think it’s only normal to have those feelings and to work through them, and we both did. Those struggles actually enforced our commitment to each other, so, in that case, they’re beneficial. I’ve often compared my wife with other women and she’s always came out at the front of the line. I just can’t imagine being married to anyone else. We are so different in so many ways, but those things don’t bother us in the least.

We like different styles of music; we don’t handle stress the same; we have different tastes in T.V. shows; she is easily embarrassed and I love embarrassing her; I’m more organized; she’s good at math, I’m good at English; I work with computers and they’re terrified of her. I think it might work to our advantage to be such opposites in so many ways because it forces us to be patient and unselfish toward each other, and isn’t that what life is all about? We are all born selfish and it takes a lifetime to unlearn that. Marriage should be a tool that helps us if we’ll let it. It’s so very easy to be selfish with our time and interests, but if we really love our mate we’ll push those aside for them. I try and treat my wife as if she’s a princess. I want her to think she’s the most important person in my world and I would not hesitate to change my plans if it would benefit her in any way.

She’s always been my best friend since the moment I met her, and I didn’t care who criticized me for that over the years, I think that’s how a husband and wife are supposed to act like. When I was first married and someone asked me to do something I’d want to check with Kathy to see if she minded and would get ridiculed and criticized for it. I didn’t care. I knew I’d rather spend time with her than anyone else anyway.

So, anyway, I bought her some flowers while I was at lunch today and I’m taking her out to eat tonight for Valentines. I’ll probably get her a little something else on Monday just because it’s the official day anyway…...

And, she’s worth it!