Well, I have to be thankful for medicine I suppose. It does have it's benefits, that's for sure. Like, prolonging life, blocking pain, and easing the runs. But, in my case right now it's also making me 'normal' again, whatever that is. I feel much better today than I have for the last week or so and I'm grateful. I can actually sit at home alone and not obsess over things I have no control over. Last week was scary and I did not like it, not one little bit. I could not get my mind to behave and focus on what I knew was true. It just wanted to focus on bad things that I knew was untrue, but no matter how much I tried I could not get it under control. I don't know if you've ever experienced it, but it's bad.

We're assuming it's a side effect of the drug I'm taking to control my cancer. I have no other reason to be depressed that I know of, so I'm hanging the blame on it.

Now, during this ordeal, the one thing that was constant was my wife's understanding and patience way with me. She is the most amazing woman, full of compassion; thoughtful; caring; gentle and loving. She accepted no offense when I offered it, knowing it wasn't me that was speaking, but the depression. She listened without judgement and didn't try to figure things out for me. She was patient and loving during the whole ordeal. And when I found that I couldn't make logical decisions (like pick out a pair of shoes), she helped me out. She called the doctors for me and even found a set of tires for my car. I just couldn't get my mind to work and she sensed it. When I had to drive to Columbus to work on my daughter's house she volunteered to go with me because she knew I wouldn't do well driving that far on my own. And we really enjoyed the ride because we were able to talk things through during the trip.

I have to say again, that she is the love of my life and for good reason. She is one in a million and I can't believe she chose to live her life with someone like me. I, above all me have been blessed beyond what I deserve in this life. Thank you Lord for my wife!



You’re my closest friend, a bond that will not end

You and I together, we can face the stormy weather

and wherever I may go, you’ll be there for me I know

the warmth of your embrace I know could never be replaced


and I will never understand why you would stay

I know I try your patience everyday

but you’re my friend



You’re my closest friend I’m a amazed at how we blend

me and all my thoughtlessness and your patience never ends

and as we both grow old you’ll be there for me I know

you always seem to be a source of constant strength to me


And every dream I ever dreamed you answered

On the day that we both said I do

How can I begin to ever thank you, oh for all you do

Lynn Mulkey